It's been a while since I've blogged so I figured I try to put something up. Forgive me if this has a lack of direction.
Well we have 4 weeks left in Wichita. I guess lately I've been battling with the perspective that I have on that statement. The last week has been a lot harder because we haven't had as much to do so my mind hasn't been occupied with things happening right in front of me. Instead, I find myself thinking about home, future trips, or even school this fall. I really didn't think I'd have such a problem with this, but I've been "homesick". This really bothers me. I guess it's a natural reaction to miss the familiar and comfortable, but I wish my heart was so set on Christ that He was my home. I want to be able to say that anywhere I go is home because my Savior never abandons me..and truly believe it. My mind knows it, but my heart doesn't, at least not yet.
So far this summer, God has really stripped a lot away from me and has put me in a place of constant self-evaluation. I think this is the first time in my walk with Him that I've realize what it's like to be in the process of refining. I know He has been refining me in the past, but I've never seen it for what it actually was. I guess what I'm trying to say is this is the first time I've really noticed what the fire feels like. The difference is that in times of trial before I didn't notice the hope...the hope that this will mold me more into the image of Christ. Or maybe I "knew" that trials are for a reason, but I'm just now believing and trusting in that.
It's cool to look back on the last several years of life and see where God has taken me and what He's taught me. I can see the things He told me that He was going to do in me back in 9th grade coming to fruition. The conclusion that I come to when I think back about all that stuff is that God has never wronged me, lead me astray, or broken a promise...so why should I ever doubt?
I know this blog is all over the place. Lo siento. So I just got done reading through Ecclesiastes. I guess it's been very helpful while I've been away from home and here this summer. I know it's all about the futility of life, but more so the big reoccuring thing that I noticed was despite the fact that we all die, we need to hold every moment captive. Life is short and this life can be one filled with joy regardless of the things that cause pain or sorrow. I guess for me that means taking advantage of every breath I breathe while I'm here in Wichita, and not being focused on the things to come once I get home.
Oh, and I wanted to write about some Patriotism stuff, but it'd take too long so here's an article that says basically exactly what I would say. "For (too much) love of Country"
